Politicians know that the road to the White House goes through Broughton. Show me a candidate who never made a visit to Broughton and I’ll show you a loser. Yes, sometimes the losers (Al Gore) also visit Broughton, but at least they were trying. Since politicians visit Broughton all the time, the students are prepared to ask tough questions and demand real answers. It came as no surprise that Broughton senior, Snow Holding, took it upon himself to ask Newt Gingrich to “Newt-er Obama” during Newt’s visit last week. Newt graciously answered the request instead of walking out like he did in a recent interview with the Daily Tar Heel. None of the major news networks picked up on the story, since most of the liberal media consists of news anchors who are too busy trying to be celebrities, like Anderson Cooper and that Rachel Maddow guy. I’m not sure how WCAP covered this story, because no matter how many times I call and yell at them, Time Warner Cable refuses to add any Broughton closed circuit channels to my cable package.
To avoid the lamestream media, Snow agreed to do an exclusive interview with ITB Insider™. I spoke with Snow earlier this week to let him tell his side of the story.
WNFIV: After you asked Newt to “Newt-er Obama” the local news picked up on your comments, but I never saw a quote from you. Did any members of our lamestream media contact you to see what you had to say?
Snow: No, they did not.
WNFIV: Typical. They’re really good at writing stories without actually doing any research.
Snow: I don’t know if you saw that article about the sign that I used being a slur. (The sign said “Newt-er Obama”.) In the N&O a woman wrote that the sign was an act of blatant racism and it was neither witty, nor benign. And that it was a reference to castrating lynch mobs.
WNFIV: Wow. I don’t even know what that means. I didn’t hear about that. I don’t read the N&O anymore.
Snow: I don’t blame you.
WNFIV: The other thing I don’t like about the local “news” is that they just assume since people are in high school they don’t know what’s going on in the world, and can’t think for themselves. But you can vote.
Snow: I know one or two things about politics to be able to hold a conversation for a little while.
WNFIV: Exactly. They need to give people more credit where it’s due. Do you have anything to say about your “Newt-er Obama” request or about the state of the economy?
Snow: I’m not even really a huge Newt Gingrich fan. There aren’t too many things Newt rhymes with or anything, that’s about as clever as I could get. I feel like Obama is so obsessed with European politics and it’s clear as day that it’s not working. The whole socialistic approach that he’s taking, trying to make everything fair, in spite of the success with the economy. Universal healthcare is a complete joke. There’s no such thing as a free product that’s decent. I mean, if you go to Scandanavia sure, but we’re not Scandanavia, we have over 300 million people and that’s just unreasonable. I dunno, he’s tanking the whole thing.
WNFIV: Well said. The only reason Europe exists is so we can have badass places to brag about when we come back from studying abroad. Since Obama isn’t the correct answer, who do you think was the most ITB president?
Snow: Ronald Reagan.
WNFIV: Good answer. We were debating Reagan vs. Bush the other day.
Snow: Reagan’s a little more untouchable than Bush.
WNFIV: Right. So how many times a week do you go to Crowley’s?
Snow: I’m actually kind of old for my grade…
WNFIV: If you’re old enough to vote, you’re old enough to go to Crowley’s.
Snow: I certainly have a number of friends who like to go over there.
WNFIV: Good to know the tradition’s being kept alive. Do you think Romney can beat Obama?
Snow: I hope so. I’m just behind whoever can get him out of office. I’d vote for my neighbor’s dog.
WNFIV: Good to hear.
It should also be noted that Broughton supported Snow’s right to free speech and didn’t punish him, or actually even say a word to him about his comments. Snow will attend Wake Forest next year to study political science, and I’m guessing a concentration in late night economics. Snow will be awarded with a limited edition ITB Insider™ shirt for his act of ITB heroism.