by William Needham Finley IV™

York Security Guard Saves Cameron Village

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Cameron Village is back to normal after a wild night that included a visit from police and SWAT teams. We are all safe thanks to the heroism of a York Security Guard who will be awarded the ITB Medal of Honor for his bravery. Around 7:45 pm on Thursday evening, some Twitter users began to report hearing police sirens in Cameron Village and on Wade Avenue. I was on my way to the Chick-fil-A and confirmed that cops were flying down Oberlin, assuming something was happening downtown. It turns out that an attempted robbery was taking place at the Cheshire Cat Gallery, an antique store that sells some of the finest ITB heirlooms, and Chris Brunner’s “A Beautiful Experience” photography book. Fortunately, I was informed of a witness, Daniel Nolan (@DannyNolls), who was live streaming the events while sitting in his car in the parking lot.

I joined others as Daniel watched and narrated the action from the literal front row for almost an hour, providing us with #ITBNN coverage that was better than any of our competitors. That’s coverage you can ITBelieve in. I pulled out the most important parts of the video to bring you one of the best interviews I have ever seen.

We learned so much from this man. For the past week, someone has been trying to rob the Cheshire Cat Gallery. Last night was the fourth night that the store has been broken in to this week. The store manager said that the crime lord had previously tried to use drills to get in through the back doors, but was unsuccessful. The savage crime lord then started tearing holes into the wall as a way to enter the store. Earlier in the week he was able to steal some precious ITB jewelry and Samurai swords (that’s not a joke).

According to our hero, he noticed a hole in the wall in the Cheshire Cat Gallery and called the police. When they arrived, our hero let an officer into the building, who immediately called for backup. Police cars came from everywhere and were soon joined by SWAT teams. The crime lord tried to make his escape through the roof of the old ABC store location, which is where the police and SWAT team caught him. A member of the SWAT team said the reason they had so many responders is because the Cheshire Cat sells antique guns.

Since I’m a media empire, I obviously used Daniel’s live stream as a chance to plug my wonderful lawyers and sponsors, Miller Law Firm and 80Fresh, because that’s just good leverage.

Everyone owes Daniel Nolan a beer for his service to ITB last night. I’m going to start working on plans to erect a statue for the York Security Guard. 

Full broadcast:

We’ve received some additional reports from people on Facebook that I’ll update as the story develops:

“Talked to Cameron Village Bar & Grill crew. One of their cooks was also held at gunpoint by an individual during this whole thing.”

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