by William Needham Finley IV™

Hayes Barton Mom Wins James Beard Award For Thanksgiving Dinner

in Humor by

Mary Allison Marlowe has finally been recognized for her culinary skills after preparing a Thanksgiving dinner unlike any other. The James Beard Foundation presented Marlowe with the “Outstanding Thanksgiving Dinner (12 Seats and Under)” award on Thursday evening.

Marlowe’s award-winning meal featured the following dishes and wines:
Country Ham Rolls
Bacon and Scallion Cheese Biscuits
Deviled Eggs
Butter Whipped Mashed Potatoes
Three Cheese Mac & Cheese
Green Bean Casserole W/ Fried Onions
10 LB. Bone-In Smoked Turkey Breast
Pecan Pie
Chocolate Peanut Butter Cream Pie
Fritz Müller ‘Perlwine’ Müller-Thurgau Trocken 2017 (4 bottles)
Franck Besson ‘Rose Granit’ Sparkling Rosé (4 bottles)
Bodegas Chacra “Barda”- Pinot Noir 2017 (4 bottles)

Judges overlooked the fact that the entire meal was ordered from the Ladyfingers Thanksgiving Menu, and that all of the wine was selected by experts from Seaboard Wine.

“We know she bought the whole meal from Ladyfingers, and we don’t care. We’re just tired of getting Facebook DMs, texts, and calls from her every year for the last sixteen years. We gave her this award so she’d leave us alone,” said an award representative, who asked not to be named.

After composing a lengthy caption for her Instagram post about how thankful she is for the award, Mary Allison Marlowe sat back to enjoy a bottle of rosé as she waited for the likes to roll in.

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